Lisanti Quarterly
Nothing good can come of this.
[contact: marklisanti at gmail dot com]
Sep 16
Disappointment of the Day: WigSalon’s Sarah Palin wig is actually just their Raquel Welsh model.
The wig’s going to be the easy part of my costume. But I’m still looking into a financially feasible way to circle the West Hollywood Halloween Carnaval in a seaplane, firing a high-powered rifle at confederates in wolf outfits as I run them ragged up and down Santa Monica Blvd, all while keeping civilian casualties to a minimum.
“ He did this,” Douglas Holtz-Eakin told reporters this morning, holding up his BlackBerry. “Telecommunications of the United States is a premier innovation in the past 15 years, comes right through the Commerce Committee. So you’re looking at the miracle John McCain helped create and that’s what he did.
— What’s that you say? John McCain can’t send the e-mail or do a Google? Oh yeah? Well, he invented the fucking BlackBerry, sonny boy.
Sep 15
Black Monday, indeed: Outside a devastated Lehman Brothers, Stern show Wack Packers Sal and Richard take refuge in each other’s embrace (and in some nipple-licking, just for good measure).
[The action unfolds around the :42 mark.]
![Bunny Lebowski [via nevver]](http://media.tumblr.com/2m8BXUfridwa5nolHHvCXL0Do1_500.jpg)
Bunny Lebowski [via nevver]
Sep 14
“ On Sunday, a campaign adviser confirmed that Ms. Palin had, indeed, watched the “Saturday Night Live” skit from her screen at the front of the plane. “She thought it was quite funny,” the adviser said in an email response to inquiries, “especially because the governor has dressed up as Tina Fey for Halloween.
—
Is this more evidence of Sarah Palin’s sense of humor (see her RNC speech for her facility with Triumph-style insult comedy), or proof that she’s exceptionally lazy? Pairing a suit jacket with jeans instead of a skirt doesn’t really constitute a Halloween costume.
» Three dead following quarrel over penis size
Thank God I’m huge and don’t have to get involved in these potentially deadly squabbles.
[via caro]
Sep 13
Sophie Can Walk: One family’s brave journey to defy the miracle-haters who claimed their baby would never walk…before her first birthday.
Brilliant. Moving. True.
[via nickdouglas]
A Trainwreck, Explained
“Obviously two trains are not supposed to be at the same place at the same time.” -Metrolink spokeswoman Denise Tyrell, regarding today’s big trainwreck.
Sep 12
Just moments after telling a lie to Whoopi and Barbara about believing Barack Obama was referring to Sarah Palin with his “lipstick on a pig” remark, John McCain issued a world-weary sigh, then gently pooped out the very last bit of his soul.
[Flash 9 is required to listen to audio.]
The Price is Right Losing Horn
Is it bad that this echoes in the back of my mind on a seemingly infinite loop?
![New University of Alaska mascot: pregnant teen whose baby is also pregnant. [via Goldenfiddle]
I think it’s imperative that we all start pulling apart the Russian* nesting dolls of lies represented by these latest, obviously fake pregnancies and try to figure out who that knocked-up fetus is covering for. My gut tells me that Todd Palin and the trophy girl from his last snowmobile race** are somehow involved.
[*Russia’s close to Alaska, donchaknow! You can see it from that one island way out there, youbetcha!]
[**Makes no sense whatsoever. Or does it?]](http://media.tumblr.com/54cpou3KAdsmozfbIaBMrxgb_500.jpg)
New University of Alaska mascot: pregnant teen whose baby is also pregnant. [via Goldenfiddle]
I think it’s imperative that we all start pulling apart the Russian* nesting dolls of lies represented by these latest, obviously fake pregnancies and try to figure out who that knocked-up fetus is covering for. My gut tells me that Todd Palin and the trophy girl from his last snowmobile race** are somehow involved.
[*Russia’s close to Alaska, donchaknow! You can see it from that one island way out there, youbetcha!]
[**Makes no sense whatsoever. Or does it?]
Sep 11
Well, maybe from Rushmore through Zissou, but didn’t we all let go of that particular fantasy after Darjeeling Limited? No? Could be I’m just fickle that way with my directorial fixations. Then again, I just saw Burn After Reading, and I’m still willing to visualize every sexual encounter going forward as a key party with the Coens and Frances McDormand.
“ What myself, my co-writer, and my producers are doing here is a little different. Hoping to avoid the mind-numblingly tedious Hollywood development system, we’ve raised money on our own to produce a full season of eight one hour shows, something we’re in pre-production on right now. We’re sort of applying the indy film model of doing things to television. From there, we’re putting it on the net in places like Jaman, Blip-TV, Myspace, Hulu, etc. The hope is that it will attract one of the cable or foreign market networks to buy it as is, thus avoiding the television industry “development hell” that so many have had to live through in the past, myself included.
—
The Cajun Boy goes Hollywood. Well, goes around Hollywood.
Here’s the trailer to Huge. And this is a link to part one of the pilot. Go watch now.
“ When Larry says nothing, Walter proceeds to Plan B: destroying the new Corvette parked outside—purchased, he assumes, using the money left in the car—with a crowbar. Actually, though, the Corvette belongs to a neighbor. Neocons everywhere can sympathize.